Thriving rather than Surviving

Here we are now at the start of our second quarter as a homeschool family.  There have been interesting challenges to overcome but so far everyone is still alive and thriving in our home environment.  Here's a quick flashback of our journey thus far...

Challenge One:  How do we do this whole thing?
Simply put....one day at a time.  I'm a list maker and a planner by nature.  Homeschooling directly challenges that nature because the beauty(frustration) is that learning is flexible.  Flexible.  Bendable.  Moveable.  Some days school follows the planned schedule precisely.  Other days it's not even close.  The key is that the boys are learning.  A LOT.  They are laughing.  A LOT.  They are excited about their subjects.  A LOT.  Really isn't that the goal?  Raising eager learners.

Challenge Two:  How do we do this with Mommy working part-time?
Insert Grandma.  Praise God for my mom and her love of teaching.  She has jumped right in to teach the boys on the 3 days per week that I work.  If it's a lesson they are struggling with she saves it for me to work with them on after I get home at 2:45.  Of course I would rather be home every day with them but right now we need that little extra money from my part-time job so we make it work.  So the lesson taught to this Mommy?  Sometimes it takes a village to raise a child.  (Oh wait, didn't someone already say that?  LOL)

Challenge Three:  School is over for the day...now what do I do with them?
We learn.  We continue to teach.  Character lessons.  Responsibility lessons.  We do chores.  We play Minecraft (this game can be a HUGE teaching tool).  We go on field trips.  We play with other homeschool friends.  We spend hours at the library, outside, at the park, on a walk, taking pictures, exploring museums, watching documentaries, grocery shop to learn budgeting, drawing, singing...exploring God's creation all around us.

I am learning more about my children.  They are learning more about me.  About Daddy.  About Grandma.  About God.  About the world.  This is a blessing.  Yes, it can be a challenge at times.  Yes, I still have days when I want to throw in the towel but those are fewer and fewer.  We might just be addicted to this.  To each other.

Battleground

I'm probably famous for saying, "Is this the hill I'm gonna die on?" when it comes to dealing with the boys (or even difficult people) during conflict.  Some behaviors can be attributed to tiredness, illness, or even over-stimulus.  Sometimes it truly is easier to let something slide if it's not a character issue.  IF it's not a character issue.

Character.  Oh so important character.  The Fruits of the Spirit.  The choice to live like Jesus.  The lessons I find most important to instill into our sons that they might grow to men of principle, men of integrity, men of God.  It's the greatest burden we have as parents...teaching character.  Specifically the character of God...teaching them to be men who emulate Jesus.  Far beyond mathematics, science or English.  Any man can be smart but not every man will have character.

I looked today into the hostile eyes of my son, daring me to fight him.  Breathe in, breathe out.  Is this a hill I should die on or is there a greater battle lurking?  The scheduler in me wants to battle on - get the lesson done.  The pride in me wants to battle on - demand the respect I deserve as a parent.  Thankfully, the gracious Holy Spirit whispers to me..."character."  Books are closed.  Angry feet stomp to a bedroom after being instructed to go and take a moment to think about actions.

It's time to breathe.  To collect myself.  Soon I will go to the bedroom and quietly talk about respect, kindness, work ethic and the importance of self-control.  Far more precious this time spent...battling for this child's soul.   Prayers go up for the right words, for a tender heart, for this boy who is struggling so hard right now in this phase of life...Lord, give us strength to do what is right.

For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.
Ephesians 6:12

Finding our groove

Here we are...three weeks in!  It takes time but we're finding our groove as we start week 4.  This adventure is not for the meek or the easily frustrated.  I've found myself wanting to give up at least twice but even then it wasn't that I wanted to give up schooling, it was more of a complete personal meltdown that really just required a "Mommy Time Out" - even if that just meant time by myself to go brush the horses, or take a shower, or read a few pages in a book without the fighting.

Fighting.  Well, there's a bit of crazy.  Lately it seems I'm always fighting with someone, for someone.  Epiphany finally hit.  The boys aren't really naughty all the time.  They just do such a good job of taking turns being naughty and spacing it just right that it SEEMS like I'm always in conflict about something with someone.  Truth is they are very sweet and loving and just when I want to run screaming down the driveway begging a passerby to take me away, they do something amazing.  It's a big brother helping build a cool Lego car for a little brother.  It's boys with heads together looking in a exploration book.  It's a 4 year old snuggled with a puppy, head on his big brother's lap, sleeping.

So I learn.  To breathe in and breathe out.  To soak up the moments when there is peace and unpack them as a good memory when the tired overwhelms a boy.  When the tears start.  When a fist is raised.  

We've made it this far.  We are learning.  Learning to be content and at peace with each other.  Learning to be partners.  Friends.  Companions.  We are finding the joy of coming back together after having visited a friend for there really is no place like home.  We can share.  We can work together.  We can still love  - even in anger.  We can forgive when the anger passes.  Math, English, Science...yes, important to know but it's the character development that we most need.  THIS is why we are here.

A Journey Starts with a Single Step...

We made it through our first week!  We did it!  Organized and without huge trouble!

Learning is happening here and it is good!

The Rubber Meets the Road...and the Tire Pops!

I knew the day would come but I can't believe it's already hit me this quick. The "CHALLENGE" day.  The day when the boys are deciding to be really obnoxious to each other as they sit across the table from each other, books open and pencils engaged in war.  Rage against the system boys! Rage against each other!  

Pencils poke.  Feet kick.  Scream and make faces.  Mom buries face in hands.

No, I won't give up.  I won't let us quit.  I won't let them quit.  I won't quit.  Some semblance of assignments will be done today.  

Separation.  One at the computer doing math games while the other grumbles because "That's not the way Mrs. Nichols does it."

Enter the 4 year old who is no longer content to do his puzzle with his auntie.  Demands. Playdough...appeased.

Here's the headache I've been feeling tingle at the edge of my brain.  Full force and ouch, I just want to go to bed for a while but there are these children to teach, laundry to do, jelly to be finished and my mind is elsewhere thinking of my mother and the task that she has to do today.  Her burden so much larger than mine.  

"Go easy.  Rest in Me.  There will be these days but I am working in them and in you and through you.  Rest in Me."

Break time declared. We've struggled through our math and English but they are done.  Lessons have been absorbed.  Children are separated to play for a while and I hear the buds of laughter starting to bloom as the washer chugs happily.  All will be accomplished...in time.

It's a Whole New World...

Fast forward to July 9, 2013...

We've been through a devastating F5 tornado which took our home and most of our "stuff."  We've rebuilt and replanted and are still recovering in so many areas but God is still good and faithful.  So here we are...back in our home for just over a year now and taming the wild back into a bit of manageable chaos.  We've added horses to the mix. We've gained land.  We've changed and grown.

This year's big adventure is the addition of home-schooling to our family.  Yep, we finally did it.  We pulled the boys at the end of their 2012-2013 school year and have just started our first 2 days of school after many family meetings, hours of research and sore knees from prayer.  That is where we'll be now on this blog...chronicling the journey of our school.  Lessons learned.  Lessons relearned.  Grace granted.  Tears poured out and then dried.  Here we are.  Let the fun begin!

To read more on our tornado and recovery please visit our page Beyond the Storm